Almost.

"Most people hav no idea what will make us happy. So we go after something we think will make us happy and might be temporarly elated when we get it." - From Charmed Thirds by Megan McCafferty.

...


I've been thinking about this all day since yesterday, are we ever truly completely happy?

I wanted to get into the program, I wanted it so bad it hurt, and not that I've gotten in, I'm happy, at least I think I am. But now I'm worried I won't have enough to live, and about the million little things I have to do before I leave and say to myself, "when I get there, I'll be happy" But that's not entirely true because once I get there I'll be missing my family and my home and it all seems to be thins continuing circle.

You never know exactly what will make you happy, you just think you know, and when you get it you need something else to give you hope, something to keep you going on, looking for more. But when is it enough?

Today I saw a clear example at work, I was outside of the classroom applying individual oral exams to my students, when I got back inside this newlywed girl at my class was crying, the bell rang almost after I got in and I got to hear the reason why she was an adult crying, in the middle of a classroom, surrounded by people who aren't really that close to her. Her husband lost her job recently and now he's moving away to get a job in another state, and maybe finish his master degree there. That's good right, after something bad happpened he's moving on to maybe better things. But she works in a hospital here and she wants to do her masters in an area of specialization that is not available at that other state.

She has to be supportive of her husband and she also has to keep her head up at work, with her family and now at school. There is just so much you can take. I felt bad for her, her husband studies English at our school too but I've never been his teacher. I've just seen them in the halls, saying good bye to each other, still glowing everytime they look at each other in the eyes. They truly do love each other and I wish nothing but the best for them. Hopefully, they'll be strong enough to make it through this.

I hope they can find happiness, as much as you can find being apart from the person you love. I hope they can find it almost as much as I wish I can.




ttfn

Sexy: When guys blush and smile nervously. I think there's nothing cuter than that.
Unsexy: Guys who shave their legs.
Song of the day: Head Over Heels by Foreign Oren.


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"So everything we believe about happiness is wrong," I said.

He nodded.

"Everything?" I asked, when what I meant was, Everything? Including you? Including me?

And Marcus, being Marcus, knew what I really wanted to know, and answered my silent, more significant question. He held up his hand to shield the rays and looked me in the eyes.

"Almost."