the January effect

I haven't been blogging much, mostly because I've been reading. I've been working and translaing and hanging out with friends, but mostly reading.

This week JD Salinger passed away; it's not like if I asked myself every day, "what is Salinger doing today?" but the news still hit me hard. I've had a crush on Holden Caulfield since I read the Catcher in the Rye, his rebellion, and depression and just the feeling that he was a real person, a real teenager, even if the book was writting so many years ago, it's still timeless. It's one of the books I will give to my children in their teenage years. Someone in twitter said "I prefer to think JD Salinger has just decided to become extra reclusive." I liked that, that is how I'll like to remember JD.

"When I was all set to go, when I had my bags and all, I stood for a while next to the stairs and took a last look down the goddam corridor. I was sort of crying. I don't know why. I put my red hunting hat on, and turned the peak around to the back, the way I liked it, and then I yelled at the top of my goddam voice, 'Sleep tight, ya morons!'"


My uncle's father in law passed away too, and I felt so bad too, not because of me but because of my cousins, I lost my grandma pretty young and although I'm happy I at least got the chance to meet her, it's still depressing because she shouldn't be a memory, she should be IN my life right now. I don't want them to miss him or need him as much as I need her sometimes.

Also, this week one of my students came up to me and told me she couldn't come to class for the rest of this week because one really close friend had passed away, and they were going to have masses in his name all week at the same time as our class. As she was saying this she started crying. Now, I'm NOT good at comforting people, actually, I suck at it. I avoided going to my uncle's father in law funeral because I know, just know that I'm gonna say an inapropiate comment, or make fun of something when I know I shouldn't, I just can't help it, it's just because I get too nervous, I never know what to say.

My friends know this, some of them tell me they prefer me to crack a joke, and that sometimes it makes them feel better when they have to deal with a sucky situation. But people who don't know me pretty well don't know about my nervousness, so I did the nicest thing I could have done and gave her a hug. I'm not a hugging person, but at that point I felt like hugs were more powerful than anything I could have said.